DA – Warning Signs

Warning Signs

Warning signs of abusers and abusive relationships are oftentimes called "Red Flags". These red flags are behaviors that you can observe that may indicate that a person may be abusive, or that you (or a friend/family member of yours) is in an abusive relationship.

Please Note: Seeing red flags does not necessarily mean that the relationship is going to become abusive! If you think you are seeing red flags, a good idea would be to communicate with the person that you are feeling uncomfortable with some of their behaviors and ask that they stop or change the behaviors. If they are unwilling to do this, you may want to consider leaving or seeking help from a parent, teacher, counselor, TERA, or other trusted adult.

Red Flags Before Getting Into a Relationship

  • Person has been in physical fights with friends or strangers
  • Person is cruel to children or animals
  • Person becomes overly jealous
  • There's a big age difference. We may see this age gap in adult relationships, but for adolescents, a person may use their age and "experience" as a power and control tactic.
  • You receive an unhealthy amount of texts or phone calls from this person (based on your own boundaries)
  • Person constantly blames others for their feelings and problems
  • Person has a problem with authority, or people telling them what to do

Red Flags in a Relationship

  • Partner tries to control who you talk to, where you go, what you wear, who you follow on social media, etc.
  • Person becomes overly jealous
  • The relationship seems to move quickly
  • You receive an unhealthy amount of texts or phone calls (based on your boundaries)
  • You notice you're spending less time with people you care about
  • You notice you're doing less of the things you enjoy
  • Partner blames you for their feelings, problems, and behaviors
  • You worry about making your partner angry or upset

Always remember: If it just doesn't feel right, trust your heart. Or, text TERA!

For a list of more behaviors to look out for check out our Power and Control Wheel.